When I was in high school, I heard a quote that I think of occasionally: “You never know when you’re making a memory.” There are times in our lives where this is incredibly true.
The past two months have been filled with lots of memory-making. Starting with last month when we threw Amanda a baby shower. She is having a baby girl, Callie, two weeks after my wedding. Taking part in her baby shower was very special to me, as I decided a few months ago that it is time to take back my personal time and give the enjoyment of the beautiful life I’ve built for myself a little boost with some additional hours in the day. I’ve missed my time with Amanda over the years, and I am glad I was able to share this special time in her life with her and her family as it should be.
A few weeks later, Amanda returned the favor by working with my mom and Lani to throw me the most perfect wedding shower I could have asked for. We had a tea party at a little tea house in Point Loma. It was girly and handmade and caffeinated, and it was everything I wanted it to be. Pictures to follow.
Our weeks of fun and wedding planning came to a screeching hault last week when the family got a call that VV’s grandma was in the hospital and “not heading in the right direction”. After a full day at the hospital, the worst was confirmed: she would not be recovering this time. At least 30 loved ones sat through torturous hours of a ferocious game of will-she-won’t-she until they were finally called in to say goodbye, in room 3121, shortly after midnight.
The days to follow were heavy. They were filled with tears, each representing both the family’s sorrow that she will no longer come back to the house where they all grew up, and joy for the woman she was to each person and the life she lived. She was the glue of the family, teaching life lessons, offering support, living her life, and loving everything she could. She raised VV in his childhood, and he is a spitting image of she and his grandpa in so many aspects of his life. I was only fortunate enough to spend the last four years with her, but those four years left a lasting impression.
I’ve always joked with VV about my conversations with his grandma because her English and my Spanish are equally terrible. We would sit in the kitchen and talk to each other, almost inventing the other person’s side of the conversation, laughing and smiling, happy to be entertained by the other despite the language barrier. As time went on, I understood her better, but it never mattered anyway. I’ve been trying not to think about it, but I’m sad that I won’t be able to see her with VV at our wedding. I can only hope to honor her memory by loving her grandson as much as she did. Today was her burial, and VV gave a beautiful speech. The day was gloomy, but it was uplifting to be so welcomed into such a tight-knit family who loves each other as much as the Camberos’ do.
Yesterday was our wedding rehearsal at the theatre. It was a great reminder of how special the wedding will be. Walking the stage and barking orders at my closest friends breathed excitement and curiosity into me. No matter what happens, it will be absolutely perfect because every detail of our wedding is perfectly us. The ceremony will be everything we wanted it to be, and we will be on our way to San Francisco to enjoy our first few days as a married couple by Sunday morning. I’m looking forward to spending the day reflecting, prepping, visiting, and enjoying all the details we’ve put so much of ourselves into this year. And… to saying “I do” to the love of my life.